How To Live Your True Purpose

What is your purpose here? What is your truest desire? Your desires are the map to the life you really want to live.  However, from a very young age you have been conditioned to be fearful and taught to play it safe. Whether this conditioning has come from the bad news you see on TV or the stories from your parents – you are designed to live cautiously at risk of getting hurt (physically emotionally or even financially).

We see this all the time in day-to-day life. Anytime someone we know decides to take risks (travel the world, quit their job to follow a passion, etc) instead of being supporting we often caution them of the dangers.

  1. What if they get hurt?
  2. They will probably fail.
  3. What if they go bankrupt?

We are raised to “follow our dreams” but are later cautioned to take the safe route – get a good job and stick it out because it will lead us to happiness.

Now stop for a minute and imagine a world where the opposite were true.

Imagine if we supported people whole hardly in their pursuits.

When it comes to fear, you have no guarantee that the BAD things you fear are going to happen. In fact following your dreams could actually lead to something absolutely incredible, but you won’t know if you don’t try!

Here are my 3 tips for you to stop listening to everyone else, and start living your true purpose. As always you can find the audio version on iTunes, SoundCloud, and Google Play.

1. Learn to Get Comfortable In It

What is “it” you ask? Well, “it” can be whatever you want. Your dream job, your dream relationship, your dream vacation… you can decide to go for it, whatever it is.

NEWS FLASH – your freedom is on the other side of fear. I am not saying quit your job and go frivolously spend 10k on a trip to Bali. I am saying that fear is likely the one major component holding you back from chasing whatever it is you want.

In order to fulfill the seemingly impossible dream, the first thing you need to do is get comfortable in the idea that anything is possible. You create your own reality. Decide what it is you want and decide that you are going to get.

2. Think to The Future

Start now by remembering a time you did something you were really scared to do. Whether it was bungee jumping, moving away from home for the first time, starting a job you weren’t even sure you were qualified for… Whatever it is – I want you to think back to that time!

How do you feel about it now?

It is funny how our fears are less scary looking back on… Something that nearly immobilized us at the time has us now thinking “Wow I can’t believe I was afraid of THAT!”

Now what I want you to do with whatever it is you are afraid, is pretend to look back on what it from a future you. You need to tell yourself, “I am going to do this, and it won’t be so bad.”

3. Break Down the Fear

Lastly, determine what part of your dream you are afraid of.

  • Is it failure for not being able to succeed?
  • Is it humiliation for even trying?

On the other hand, imagine you were to give up on the dream entirely. What could potentially happen?

  • Maybe sadness for never finding out if it was even possible?
  • Maybe humiliation for never having the guts to try?

Now you need to decide which of these two possibilities is worse.

Would you rather continue to live in mediocrity, or would you rather pursue success? (And yes potentially failure, but THINK of what you could learn!)

We are all so stuck in our comfort zones that we are afraid to move. Stop letting the fear of not doing whatever your dream is outweigh the fear of getting it done.

YOU CAN DO THIS.

Determine your dream, get comfortable in the idea that it is possible, think of how easy it will feel when it’s over and focus on breaking down what silly little thing it is that you are actually afraid of.

YOU CAN DO THIS. I CAN DO THIS. WE CAN ALL DO THIS.

How to Find Your Own Happiness

Finding Happiness

Happiness.  Easy for some, elusive for many.  While many may disagree, I believe that you can make decisions which lead to overall happiness and contentment in life. It may not be easy; in fact at times it will be seemingly impossible, but by making the effort to monitor your thoughts and actions, and steer course towards a more balanced present, happiness can and will be achieved.

Taking time to reflect, and making conscious steps to make your life happier, really does work.

As always you can listen to the audio version on SoundCloud, iTunes, or Google Play.

1. Choose The Right Opportunities

For most, happiness is an achievement; the result of effort and intention – not a mere coincidence. Happiness in itself is not a decision, instead it is the result of the decision to pursue attitudes and behaviours that will result in happiness over unhappiness. The key to obtaining happiness is to put yourself into environments that increase your probability and to avoid those which are detrimental or draining on our already scarce resource.

2. Foster Forgiveness

Bitterness serves as an anchor; a catalyst for stagnation. Holding onto anger and grief has been proven time and time again to negatively affect our mental and physical well being. While simply saying “get over it” is easier said than done – learning to foster forgiveness towards that which we cannot control is integral to the process of moving onwards and upwards.

  1. Recall the hurt.
  2. Try to empathize with the perpetrator – why did they do what they did?
  3. Remember a time when you were granted forgiveness.
  4. Commit to the forgiveness – mentally or physically (i.e. write it down).
  5. Do not dwell not the hurt/anger, hold on to the forgiveness.

Mulling will not get you very far, this I can assure you. Let it go, move along, don’t let the actions of other control your happiness.

3. Fake It Until You Feel Better

While the principle of this seems silly – you are sad/upset/angry/hurt why pretend to be something you are not (i.e. happy)? The psychology behind this practice is proven.  Smiling alone can induce the feeling of happiness. All feelings are the result of actions, by acting happier your brain will begin to believe that you are actually happier.

4. Put Your Negativity In Check

Negativity will always be the default. It is easy to be negative, because positivity makes us uncomfortable.  Negative thoughts serve no real useful purpose and can directly contribute to negative emotions.  Negative thoughts leave us in a state of hopelessness, thinking we will never have enough, be enough, or find enough.

Given that negativity is the norm, it can be difficult to identify in ourselves when we have shifted into this state of mind. In order to learn how to change negative thoughts, you must first learn to recognize them. Start paying attention to your thought patterns; practice mindfulness. Pay attention to your present. Focusing too much on the past (what could have been) or the future (what may never come) is neither useful nor productive.

If you can catch these thoughts before they gain momentum, you will better be able to flip the problem into perspective and deal with it in a much more positive light.

5. Engage In Meaningful Activities

Think about how you have spent the last 24 hours.

Were you productive? Did you get something accomplished?

If no, how are you feeling?

If yes, I can bet you are feeling pretty good. Studies have shown that in order to get more [happiness] out of life, you have to put more into it. People are seldom happier than when they achieve a sense of flow in their lives; a state of mind in which you become absorbed in a meaningful task or challenge. While flow-inducing activities seldom come naturally, the reward far outweighs the investment. So determine something you wish to achieve and work for it. Reap the rewards of your efforts and feel truly happy.

Find your fuel. Ignite your fire. Chase your happiness. Great things will come.